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Is It Time to Seek Out Couples Counseling?

Couples counseling can be a helpful tool in any relationship, but it is especially useful for couples who are experiencing difficulty. Whether you’re trying to fix the problem or just looking for ways to enhance your connection, there are many benefits of working with a trained professional. Here are some reasons why couples should consider seeking out sessions with an expert:

-To learn how to improve communication and turn arguments into meaningful discussions

-To help resolve conflict that may have been affecting your sex life

-To explore possible differences in values and lifestyle choices

-To get support when one partner has experienced trauma such as abuse or addiction

-For guidance on what steps to take if you want to end the relationship

What is couples counseling and how does it work?

Couples counseling is a type of psychotherapy – not unlike individual counseling – designed to help partners in a romantic relationship to be happier and more fulfilled, both as individuals and as a team. In couples counseling, the two people in a couple are treated together so they can focus on their partnership rather than individually. Couples counseling may also involve family members or friends if they are causing problems in a relationship.

Another name for couples counseling is marriage therapy . However, it’s not necessary to be married in order to have a successful therapeutic experience in the presence of your significant other.

Why should you seek out sessions with an expert?

Couples counseling is for anyone with a serious concern about their romantic relationship. This could include relationships in which either: Both partners are experiencing emotional suffering, or one partner has difficulty adjusting to a long term relationship and the other partner is having problems handling what’s going on. 

When is the right time to start going to couples counseling?

The answer to this question depends on the issue you are dealing with. In all my years of counseling couples, I have found that there are three distinct reasons that people seek out couples therapy.

1) The first type of couple is what I consider to be “The Perfect Couple.” They have been married for a number of years and have no major issues. They are happy with their marriage and enjoy going out on dates, cooking together, sharing hobbies, etc. Their kids are grown and they share in the responsibilities that come with them. There is a lot of intimacy between them, but just not enough passion. They are often wondering if there is something wrong with them as a couple because the flames of passionate love seem to have gone out.

2) The second type of couples that seek counseling are those that deal with recurring emotional or verbal abuse in their relationship. These relationships escalate from small disagreements into a major argument where excessive nagging or yelling of hurtful things (often true) occurs. These couples will fight over minor issues and end up talking to each other in ways they would never talk to anybody else. They both feel the love for one another is gone. Sometimes, they have been dealing with this kind of behavior for years and wonder if there is any hope for them to have a loving marriage.

3) The third type of couple are the ones that say, “I just don’t love you anymore.” These couples have either been married for a short amount of time or have been together for 10 years and are dealing with some of the common problems that every committed relationship encounters in order to grow, (e.g., sexual problems, financial difficulties, moving into a new phase of life issues). These couples usually have been to see a clergy person and/or attended marital retreats; however, they just don’t seem to be able to get their love for one another back.

In my opinion, it really doesn’t matter which type of couple you are dealing with, there is hope for all of you. 

Couples counseling offers both partners tools and techniques that allow everyone to understand the things they are doing to cause tension in their relationship. It also gives couples an opportunity to learn how to repair relationships when conflict occurs so that it doesn’t escalate into more severe problems. 

In general, the goal of couples therapy is to ensure that both partners in a relationship feel valued, respected, and loved for the person they are. This is accomplished through honest communication between both partners about what they need to be happy and fulfilled in life.

How can you tell if your relationship needs help from a professional?

Many people want to know if what they are going through is a common problem and one that requires professional help. All couples have disagreements from time-to-time; however, if there is an ongoing pattern of arguing about the same things over and over again, then it may be worth getting some feedback to see where you stand as a couple.

What are some of the benefits of working with a trained professional in this area?

There are numerous benefits of seeking out couple’s counseling. 

The primary benefit that is always mentioned is the professional allows couples to “air dirty laundry.” That’s one way to put it, but I prefer to think of it as a safe and neutral space where you can talk about things that you might not otherwise feel comfortable talking about with anyone else in your life. 

A trained professional will listen to you without judgment and offer feedback in a respectful way that can help you reach your own answers. Many people don’t feel comfortable talking about sexual difficulties, financial struggles, or parenting issues with anyone including their friends or family members. In cases like these, couple’s counseling is where the process begins so that couples can be on their way to a more harmonious relationship.

If this sounds like something you could benefit from, reach out and make a consultation appointment with one of our team members today!

Our psychotherapy fees start at $175 per hour (psychiatry fees start at $200 for 30 minutes).
We do not accept insurance, meaning we are not "in-network" with any health plans.
However, many of our clients submit claims to their out-of-network health insurance and receive 40-60% reimbursement.