Bethesda MD Anger Management
Understanding Anger: Bethesda MD Anger Management
by Keith Miller, LICSW
Every human is capable of anger, in which you feel and/or express frustration or disappointment for something that you expected to happen differently. Your team loses and you thought you could win. You drop the glass and don’t have time to clean up the mess. There is no moral value to the observation that you are capable of anger, it’s neither good nor bad – this is one concept we teach with Bethesda MD Anger Management.
 What happens inside of each of us after we experience anger is where anger becomes charged with either a positive or a negative moral value.
There are two kinds of anger based upon the kind of internal response we have to it:
Flexible anger is the result when we give our anger a channel in which it can flow freely and resolve back into some other form. This kind of anger motivates and energizes us to do better and feels mostly positive. At Bethesda MD Anger Management we can help your anger to do this. This kind of anger feels like electricity sometimes because it can cause us to narrow our focus in healthy ways when we know how to access it at the right time. It doesn’t overwhelm us when we are familiar with it, aren’t scared of it, and know how it likes to be used.
Burdened anger is what some people might refer to as problem anger and is viewed as bad 99.9% of the time. Our Bethesda MD Anger Management has experience with this form of anger. Burdened anger is the same physiologically as flexible anger in terms of physical arousal or feelings but it is recognized mostly by its wake of damage: to relationships, opportunities, objects, and people.
Burdened anger occurs when the spontaneous surge of anger or frustration triggers an internal drop in self-value. Your team loses, you feel defeated, you believe you’re defeated, then you act defeated.Then the cycle repeats and intensifies each time. The burden is the middle part of the cycle, the belief, which is usually about feeling doomed, hopeless, or inadequate. When you start Bethesda MD Anger Management, we can help you identify the burden in your anger. The belief of worthlessness acts to pull toward it all of the energy generated by the frustration in an inward avalanche. Like an electrical short-circuit, the energy has no place to go inside the person (unless it were to literally destroy or harm him/herself), so most people naturally self-protect and explode the energy outward toward anyone or anything nearby. Bethesda MD Anger Management can help you make sure this happens a lot less.
The Limits of Anger Management Approaches: Bethesda MD Anger Management
According to the American Psychological Association, anger management teaches techniques to manage the emotional feelings and physiological arousal of anger. This does work and is useful to the extent that some portion of your anger is flexible and does not trigger a critical mass of internal feelings of worthlessness or self-devaluing (our Bethesda MD Anger Management can help you assess this). If you feel unlovable when your spouse forgets something important to you, inadequate when you make the wrong turn on the highway, or devaluedwhen your co-worker succeeds, then trying to manage your physiological arousal will feel like trying to hold back a fire hydrant with a wine-bottle cork. If you use Bethesda MD Anger Management you can start to get relief from this kind of problem.
Transforming, Not Just Managing, Anger: Bethesda MD Anger Management
“If we become angry at our anger, we will have two angers at the same time.”
-Thich Nhact Hahn
Here are some areas that deal with anger that can improve greatly using what is called Self-Leadership, or Internal Family Systems Therapy (it’s actually not family therapy), and my approach to understanding anger with Bethesda MD Anger Management:
- Expression of anger or anger avoidance interferes with your relationship
- You or others are afraid of your anger
- You don’t understand why you feel angry sometimes
- You have missed career opportunities because of your anger in the workplace
- Anger while driving or road rage is a normal part of your driving habits
- You feel exhausted at trying to hide and protect others from your anger
- You feel embarrassed by the things you do when you feel angry
- You find yourself abusing alcohol or drugs because it helps you contain your anger or because it helps you express your anger. These are common areas addressed with Bethesda MD Anger Management.
- You want to make more decisions that are in-line with your values and not because of anger
- People important to you respond negatively to your anger
Do you have anger or does anger have you?
Bethesda MD Anger Management
If you want to stop anger from controlling your life I can help you do that. It is possible to do this in a way that respects you, goes at the best pace for you, and is not a one-size-fits-all approach.
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